Friday, July 11, 2014

I Should Hope Were My Legs REALLY Tattooed...

...That the artist would have made sure they were evenly arranged. I mean, that's OK on a pair of tights, but had that been ink, I'd be really pissed off.
 
We needed to run a few quick errands today, so I grabbed the first dressing gown I could reach, and to my surprise, it looked pretty good with the tattoo tights. As Danny pointed out, I couldn't do that again if I tried, but damn, that was some lucky styling.
The craft store is selling items to create Halloween villages like people do for Christmas. I thought these were cool.
Danny said he saw me get the stink eye from other customers no less than five times. Only five? I must be losing my touch. Next time, higher heels. When we went to pay for our candles, the woman at the register (speaking sloooowly to me like I might be too dumb to understand) points to the candles and says, "They're a natural product, and will melt."
Well golly gee! Wax melts? Who fucking knew?! But I didn't say that, instead I asked her if anyone didn't know that, and she just shrugged and said, "No returns on melted candles."
So there you are kids, today's helpful bit of information is wax melts, and stores won't take them back if you leave them in direct sunlight. Pardon me for a moment whilst I bang my head against the wall a few times...

...THUD!
THUD!
WHACK!

OK, that's better. I will note that candles stored in the freezer tend to burn longer with less dripping, but you probably already knew that, just like you know wax melts in sunlight.

Outfit Particulars:

90's black pinafore-Thrift World
Kimono-Hand-Me-Ups
Bangles-Thrifted here and there
Earrings-World Market
Shoes-K Mart
Tattoo Tights-Nobbies Costume/Party Shop


Tomorrow and Sunday is the annual Railroad Days event in Omaha and Council Bluffs. One fee per family gets you into several museums over two days with busses running regularly between venues. http://www.omaharailroaddays.com/
Danny is still not back to normal, and it may be several weeks before he's fully recovered so we may do a couple short visits to museums on both days-we'll see what he's up for. This is a favourite event, and I'd hate for him to miss it. He's not spreading anything at this point (not after all those antibiotics) so I see no point keeping him locked up indoors if he feels strong enough to get out. We've been doing short trips, here and there, but I do feel terrible for him. What a lousy way to spend your summer holiday. On a happier note, in the time he's been sick, they've re-paved the parking lot where he practises bike riding at the weekends, so he'll have a nice new surface to ride on when he feels able to again.  I checked out the full series run of Danger UXB from the library for him to watch, so at least he won't be too terribly bored. I'm curious to see it again, I thought it was engaging when I watched it originally. It seems like the sort of thing Danny would like.

So kids, remember if people give you the stink eye at the craft store because they don't approve of the way you're dressed, what do we do?

Very good! Top marks all around. Have a good weekend, class dismissed.

10 comments:

Joanna said...

Laugh, laugh. Too funny. I love those stockings. It is quite amazing how you got such a good match. I wonder what would happen if you wore them to a tattoo shop? I'm quite sure they would be impressed and maybe even ask you if you wanted the real deal:)

Goody said...

I have a real one already, though it is quite small, and on my waist. I've had it since I was 17, which if you do the maths was long before it was fashionable. I've never regretted it-the sheer horror on my mother's face was worth it! I wonder, how do today's kids freak out their parents?

Anyway, I also bought a more colourful pair that will feature at some point on the blog. Maybe I'll dress up REALLY granny with the tattoo hose to see what sort of looks that gets.

Curtise said...

Tattoo tights? How come I didn't know such things existed? They are fabulous! As are you, even though a mere five people stink-eyeing you is a poor show. Must Do Better.
I do hope Danny gets back to the full fitness soon, it's no fun to have illness and fatigue longing on during your summer holiday. And I hope you can do a bit of museum visiting.
Thanks for all the candle tips. I had NO idea about the melting. It's an education, coming here... xxxx

Connie said...

Just wait til you get grey hair like mine. Then people will talk even more slowly. You absolutely crack me up. I love your tights..well your whole outfit actually. Just a moment ago I was driving home in my car and since I didn't bolt through the intersection the split second that the light changed, the Neanderthal in the SUV behind me had to lay on his horn so I politely flipped him the bird (that is in the drivers' manual, right?) and he took a photo of me with his phone as he peeled around the corner. As soon as I got home I checked to see if the middle finger is against the law. L'oiseau is protected by the First amendment. So let it fly. Xxxooo

Goody said...

@Connie

I think using the phone whilst driving is the illegal move.

I swear, it is like young people can't emotionally connect/experience something unless it is through their phone-including being flipped off.

Sue said...

Goody you are the best and I want to go shopping with you so the dumb arse people behind the counters have two of us to deal with. I am thinking she had only just discovered the candle melting thing. You are such a good 'flip the bird' teacher, I am going to practice this all week!! I love that Connie got her photo taken doing it!! You American gals are such rebels!!

Propagatrix said...

I think the outfit is smashing. Rather than giving you the stink eye, I would have asked you to come over for a game of Hungry Hungry Hippos.

Jayne H said...

You are on top form today Goody and now I am feeling really dumb because I never knew about the candles in the freezer thing.
I just read your comment on Connie's blog post before stopping by here and didn't understand the last bit of your comment but it's all making sense now!

Goody said...

@Propagatrix

OK, I'll bring the Fritos so we don't have to raid your mother's Bridge mix for snacks.

Goody said...

@Jayne

The freezer thing comes in handy if you live in a place prone to power outages (you'll need the candles to burn longer).