Monday, September 14, 2015

Hip-Hugger Hell

Why do I subject myself to trousers?

 I spent most of today hiking-up my jeans as they settled uncomfortably below the top of my undies. How the hell do people wear these things?! The second I'd go to sit down, I could feel them slipping lower and lower. I'm too old for this nonsense, so away they go. Life's too short to spend it with your ass crack showing. 

This evening I watched The Poseidon Adventure for the first time in forty years. Funny, but I didn't think it was that terrible a movie until I saw it again tonight. It was dreadful. A good cast can only do so much with a script like that. Anyway, we've now watched, Airport '75, The Towering Inferno, and The Poseidon Adventure which means all we have left to our 1970's disaster movie series is Earthquake. Then, we can move on to other action movies of the era like, Skyjacked, and Two Minute Warning. 

Danny requires the captions on to watch a movie comfortably, and I have to say it is an entirely different experience watching something captioned. Sometimes, the captions are waaaay off (and hilarious) but most of the time it just lets you experience just how terrible the writing is on most television shows and movies. Where I could otherwise get lost in a cheesy disaster flick, the captions prevent me from watching without noting the awful writing. I don't get with foreign language films, so perhaps there's something about reading and listening to your native tongue that alters the experience . I guess I could try watching with French captions as an experiment. 

Outfit Particulars:
Skinny jeans (on a fat lady) K Mart
Black tunic-Dots in Revere, MA about 15 years ago
Blouse-Marshalls-a couple years ago
Vintage Sydney California handbag-New Life Thrift
Ruff Hewn clogs-Dillards, years ago
Earrings-K Mart
Metal bangles-K mart
Fragrance-Rive Gauche

The Halloween shops are opening across town. I don't think this one is scary at all-he reminds me of Marty Feldman. 
"Bring me a shrubbery...but nothing too nice..."
This one is scary. He has a motion sensor too-wouldn't that be fun in the front yard?
"Ah yes, I must retire to Olympus to give it further consideration."

"Hey trousers, here's what I think of 'ya."

Outfit Particulars:

Trousers-Target about 15 years ago
1970's men's shirt-Goodwill
Wooden beaded bag with beaded fringe-Goodwill
Hybrid coyboy boots/clogs-Hand-Me-Ups
1970's polyester Russ Togs jacket-Thrift World
Hoope earrings-K mart
Fragrance-Burberry for Women (original from mid-90's)

The last of the green tomatoes were harvested today, and in their place I sowed Seven Top turnip greens (they only grow the greens) and some assorted lettuces. The pattypan are mostly done, but I feel sorry for the bees, so I'm leaving the vines with flowers a bit longer. Spinach will replace the squash at some point next week. Now I have to get started on the yearly batch of green tomato chutney, and a batch of mincemeat. I'll wait until the weekend when we attend the apple festival and trip to the orchard as I will need apples for both recipes. Our weather's been beautiful, but experience tells me it won't last.
I spotted this frog popping his head out of the algae-covered pond at Heron Haven. I'll bet he knows the weather's changing.
 This micro-chipped Monarch butterfly knows it as well.
 Soon the shallow water will be covered with ice instead of algae.
The sunflowers are ready to quit, but still turn to face the sun. 

I'm going to make a point of getting to Heron Haven more often, as we live a ten minute drive from there. It will be interesting to watch it change through the seasons, and I( hope to have photos to post here. 


Connie said...

Wait. What? They micro chip the butterflies? It must be so uncomfortable for them. I love your trouser outfit. From the plaid shirt right down to the cowboy boots you are channeling my Aunt Mercedes mid 1960's. You don't know my Aunt Merce but believe me, that is a very good thing.

Beth Waltz said...

I admire Mr. ETB's lofty mein, so suitable for his headgear! Danny might ink some wings on his papa's least favorite shoes. Drape a sheet modestly about his formm, hand him a scroll -- et voila! a Mercurial costume! (Have you given thought to Minerva? You do have a stuffed owl. Danny could carry a bow and arrow...)

I do truly admire the plentitude of plaids! Gad, but I'd like to add those spiffy cowgirl clogs to my jeans ensemble (which is a high-waisted granny version, but never mind, no jeans could ever inch beneath my Teutonic hindquarters).

Mim said...

Jeans? Just say no.

I have seen rather too much arsecrack on one of my bosses, it's not a pretty sight!

Goody said...

I don't think the butterflies can feel anything in their wings-sort of like our hair. They did a big release of tagged butterflies last weekend to track them on their migration. They're being threatened by a number of things, but lack of milkweed is the big thing (so if you have it in your yard, don't pull it!).

@Beth Waltz
We dressed Danny as Perseus one year for Halloween. I made him the Medusa head from Styrofoam with plastic snakes glued on, and a shield that had reflective mylar and a photo of the head affixed to it. That was such a fun costume.

Sometimes I have to remind myself why I don't like a style. Ugh, I really don't know how people can stand them.

Connie said...

As always, Goodie, thanks for the tip! I'm starting to plan my winter planting. We're supposed to have an El Nino this winter. Lots of rain and warm temps. So I'm making up for our very sad dry summer and planting like crazy. Milkweed at the top of the list.

Sue said...

I so hear you sister on Jeans that end up below the undy line and ass crack on display. I really dislike the so called low rise ones with the dolls clothes sized fly in them. Someone is having a laugh!! I don't do jeans anymore. A micro chipped Monarch? Wow! As you are cooling off over there we are getting warmer and oh how I long for the return of summer. Winter has been so WET!!! I watched all those movies you mentioned 100 years ago when they were the thing to watch. So lame now tho'. Good for a laugh as you sit and pick it apart bit by bit.

Radostin said...

You do look fabulous in both be-trousered outfits. That plaid pair is really something.

Goody said...

Take care of Summer for us-I know she's in good hands.

Thank you. I'm still not really comfortable in trousers, but I guess it is good to get out of your comfort zone once in a while.