High Holidays

The holidays really did sneak up on me this year, but I have a honey cake in the freezer, and tomorrow I will do a marathon challah baking session. I probably have some kreplach lurking in the freezer as well. I don't feel like doing anything. When my best friend died four years ago, I lost my last Jewish friend. In a strange way, I lost the last person that "got" my cultural and generational stuff , although she was a bit older. She understood my family better than I did-and strangely enough, liked them anyway. I could handle most of my family being dead, but losing the last friend I didn't need to explain things to was devastating. What's more, I can't count on my husband to tell me if I'm putting on weight.

Anyway, it feels sad not to be shipping a challah off to Newton, Mass. I'll use her tablecloth like I have done for every Jewish holiday since she gave it to me twenty years ago, and I still have a set of hideous glassware her mother had imposed on her in the 70's (which she imposed on me in the 90's)but really, it feels a little lonely. Sure, you make new friends, but you do so with the knowledge that they can croak at any point-something you don't typically take into consideration when building friendships in your youth.

Someone make me feel better, and tell me I look fat.