Wednesday, March 19, 2014

I've Resorted To, "Dear"

Years ago, I remember explaining to a boyfriend that although my mother called him, "love", she in fact hated him as much as everyone else. It was her default for what she'd otherwise call people, which wouldn't be polite. Her mother had already done away with any attempt at polite behavior, and just collectively called people, "bastards." I like to think if my mother had lived long enough, she'd have recognised her mother was wise. Anyway, today I became irritated with someone at the grocery store and resorted to, "Oh no dear, it says in the circular there is a $1.00 coupon for coffee. You'd best check." With any luck, I'll be mumbling about the goddamned bastards any day now.

 (Specs on, or off? I've been mulling a set of contact lenses. I can't decide.)
 There's only so much stupid a person (me) can confront before that person (me) feels utterly defeated and figures, "it must be me." I'm not incapable of introspection. I'll hear someone out before I decide they are an idiot, and I hate them, and it couldn't possibly be anything at all to do with me. See? Easy!
Still, sometimes you have to deal with people you don't like, so I've adopted, "Dear" as my default. My energy for reasoning with idiots disappeared around the same time as my estrogen did. There's something powerful in staring someone down over tri-focal specs, and calling them, "dear."
 Better with the belt? Without? Oh, I can't decide. In the end I wore the belt, but I'm not sure it added anything to the overall look. I don't know why anyone would want an hourglass figure. I've spent a lifetime trying to find dresses that can accommodate a bust ten inches larger than my waist, and believe me, outside of some 1950's pieces, it is nearly impossible. I'm doomed to shirts and skirts. Now as I age, there's still a difference in inches but it comes with saggy, drooping, and (gasp) back fat. Well, a wide belt is as good a camouflage as any. "Grass is greener, etc, etc."

Outfit Particulars:

Pleated skirt: I bought it around 1981. I think I've worn it less than a dozen times, but it was, "too nice to give away." You have clothes like that too, I'm sure.
1970's Poly blouse with asymmetrical buttons-Thrifted
Shoes-Laura Ashley
Hair Flowers-Tiff and Tam
Cardigan-Sears (several years ago)
Marcasite ring-Thrifted at least twenty years ago

Let's have a look at some details:

 Until I saw it in the photo, I had no idea the ring had lost a stone. Does that happen to you? Noticing things in posts?

 I'd have bought this blouse just for the buttons. Green is my favourite colour, and you can't beat a square button for style.

Alright, 'fess-up. Do you use endearments with people you can't stand as a way of keeping yourself from uttering something horrible, yet accurate?



pastcaring said...

Yes, dear.
Well, I thought it was funny...
I do try to be excessively, icily, frighteningly polite to people I don't like, as a cover for the hatred. But I think it probably won't be long until I end up like your grandmother and go with bastards as a general term for humanity. Perhaps that will happen when my oestrogen finally dribbles away for good. Can't wait.
I like you in glasses. But a change is good too (I'm a contact lens wearer). I like the non-belted version. I like the buttons, and IO notice things all the time in photos that passed me by in reality. Cat hair, mostly.
Yeah, boobs are a pain, can't fit them in a lot of frocks, and 1950-60s boobs were clearly way, way higher and perkier than I can manage...
You know, you look great, back fat and all. And you make me laugh, you and your sarcastic misanthropy. Keep it up.
Thanks, love. xxxx

Goody said...

It is SUCH a relief when someone understands.

Joanna said...

Do you mind if I also use the word "dear" too? I love this idea, it's kind of like kill them with kindness. I should have said this multiple times to the lady at the hat exhibit who hounded me and wouldn't let me photograph. I know I must get over this. I just saw a news clip today about the show and guess what they interviewed a spectator who was taking pictures! So irritating lol. Hey, I'm totally venting on your blog post:) I love this outfit to pieces. Your brooch is just gorgeous and I just adore a lovely deco ring. What a great blouse and very much has an early 50s vibe to it. I love the aysmmetrical details.

Goody said...

I think we should start a "dear" movement.

Feel free to vent, that woman was horrible.

Northern mum down South said...

I love your glasses as they are so unusual, they look really good on you and suit your style. I am picking up my new specs tomorrow - I hope I still like them. The glasses I liked didn't suit me so the ones my DD and I picked are a bit more boring than I would have really liked but it will be good to have a change anyway.

Goody said...

@ Northern Mum

I can't wait to see what you picked out.

My "spare" pair is nearly identical, but in black, with silver. They're both vintage frames, which comes with some adjustment challenges as they tend to stretch easily, and fitting proper nosepads can be difficult. If I could find new frames I like, I'd get them because maintaining pairs that are 60+ years in age is a chore.